Instead of doing something productive and meaningful on my Friday afternoon, I decided to watch The Internship. It was the second best comedy to come out that week (behind After Earth, which was hilarious) but even then, it got only a few chuckles from me.
It was a real stretch for me to believe that a couple of dudes in their early 40s would be so computer ignorant, let alone think it’d be a grand idea to try their luck at a Google internship against a hundred young kids who actually dedicated years of their lives studying for such a position.
However, I’m fairly young myself, so perhaps I was just unable to relate to their plight. Eager to prove myself wrong, I decided to see how well my parents, who are in their mid-50s, knew teh internetz. My folks are awesome, and I think they have more of a shot at nabbing a Google internship than these two technologically challenged men. So I sat them down and asked them a few questions based on some of the movie’s gags, most of which are in this trailer:
In the film, Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson were watch salesmen, rendered obsolete by their boss John Goodman. Confused, Goodman explained that no one wears a watch anymore because they use their phones to check the time. The ‘dinosaurs’ seem surprised at this fact, which leads me to believe that they never use their phones to check the time.
So I posed the question to my parents:
Me: If there are no clocks on the walls around you, how would you check the time?
Mum: My cell phone.
Dad: Checking the sun.
One tick to Mum, a smiley face to Dad for his old-school resourcefulness.
Next, I replicated the scene where the interns had to raise YES OR NO paddles to three propositions in regards to workplace ethics. While not exactly technologically related, I was curious nonetheless to Mum and Dad’s responses. Plus, it would affect their employment prospects.
I then wanted to see if my parents knew the difference between ‘online’ and ‘on the line’. First, asked for an example of something they would put ‘online’.
Dad: Photos and info.
Bang on. One tick to Dad.
Mum: TradeMe?
Me: Well, you don’t put TradeMe online, but you’re close. What could you put on TradeMe?
Mum: Those windows that have been sitting in the garage for over three years that your bloody uncle never picked up.
Oddly specific, but another tick to Mum.
I then asked for an example of something you’d put ‘on the line’.
Dad: My life, for my family.
Dad gets two giant mo-fo ticks for that.
Mum: Clothes.
One tick for Mum.
In the same display of ignorance, Vince Vaughn develops an idea for a smart phone app that already exists: Instagram. Given that he’d never heard of the most popular photo-sharing app in the world, I asked my parents:
Me: What is Instagram?
Mum: A wha-? A telegram?
Me: No. Instagram.
Mum: I have no idea…
Dad: Isn’t it an online photographic posting thing?
I’m pretty sure I knew what dad was saying, but I had to think about that concept for a second.
Alright, Vaughn’s ignorance is justified on this one. However, I’m not so convinced that a child of the ‘70s and ‘80s would be unaware of the following:
Me: Who is Charles Xavier?
Mum: He has a Professor-y kind of name… Is he a Professor? An inventor, maybe?
Half a tick for Mum.
Dad: Professor X, founder of the X-Men.
Textbook answer from Dad. One tick for him.
Finally, in a passing remark, one of the young interns brings up an internet-popular term that Owen Wilson had never heard before. Naturally, I wondered if my parents did:
Me: What is ‘Hentai’?
Mum: Say again?
Me: Hen-tai.
Dad: Is it a type of Japanese literature? I’m not sure if that’s right…
Me: …well you’re not wrong.
With that last question, I thanked my wonderful parents for participating in my little survey, gave them a big hug and quickly returned to my flat to delete my browsing history.
After analysing the data I collected, I have made the following conclusions:
Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson’s characters still don’t use their cellphones to check the time, even though my mum does.
Google would frown upon Vaughn, Wilson and my parents for wanting to share a beer with their bosses.
My mum may have dated an intern.
My parents know the difference between ‘online’ and ‘on the line’. Vince Vaughn’s character does not.
It is very likely that the majority in Vaughn and Wilson’s generation does not know what Instagram is.
I may have invented the world’s first photographic post stamp in my mind.
My dad knows who Charles Xavier is. Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson’s characters do not.
My parents have a better shot at being Google interns than Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson’s characters.
Mum and Dad can still eat calamari with a clear conscience*.
*If you don’t get that reference, consider yourself lucky
